Many times we go around looking for the perfect guy or gal, the woman or man of our dreams who will sweep us off our feet or what many people call “THE ONE” but we have a lot of stuff to work on with ourselves. We are not where we want to be in life. We are angry, frustrated, afraid and scared because we don’t love ourselves. We all want the perfect girl or guy and the perfect scenario but here are five questions I want you to ask yourself first: Are you bringing just as much to the table as the partner you want to have? Are you loving, compassionate and considerate? Do you really know how to love, share and give equally to your partner? Are you willing to be open and honest about your future and past? Are you ready to be independent and not look for a man or female to save you but look for someone to be your partner? If the answer to these questions is YES then you are on the right track to finding your true soul mate and living an open and honest life for yourself but if the answers for these questions are NO then why are you pointing the finger at someone else? You should be pointing the finger at yourself. The old age adage is “when you point one finger three fingers are pointing back at you.” My point is take the time to heal yourself first. If that requires therapy, counseling sessions or just getting on your knees and being authentic and truthful about your life then do it. Take the time to evaluate you and who you are and what you want to be. Take the time to love yourself and treasure yourself. Loving yourself doesn’t meant that youwill be conceited or narcissistic, it means that you admire yourself where you are vulnerable, honest, truthful and open and when you need to put up boundaries you can too because that is loving yourself also. So, for this New Year when you are looking for a partner make sure that you are where you need to be before trying to make something work because in a relationship it always takes two.